|Posted on July 6, 2015 at 8:00 AM|
Last week, we talked about chunking down to our core emotional response. Chunk communication means: C = Clear/Concise H = Honest U = Uninhibited N = Natural/Normal K = Kind So what does it mean to be clear and concise in our communications? Is it enough to tell people how we feel? And do you ever wonder if the other person actually cares how you feel? Frankly, few people express themselves clearly. While many people express themselves FREELY, this does not mean they are clear and concise in what they are communicating. Just the other day, my husband asked me where I had put his loose change glass. I had knocked it over and broken and had moved his change to another jar but had failed to tell him. I could hear agitation in his voice when he asked me but I did not know WHY he was agitated. So I asked him why he sounded tense. He told me it was no big deal. He would get over it. This was neither clear or concise but he had freely told me this. However, now I felt unsure of what he might need or expect of me, if anything and I certainly did not care for the energy in the room. So I asked if he could give me more DETAILS. He said he FELT like something had been taken from him and he had a reaction to it and he felt SILLY and did not want to bother me with any of his reactions. I pointed out to him that when his energy shifts, I FEEL it and I love him and it is not a bother to me for him to share but actually firms our bond more. I thanked him for sharing and all was well again in our home. By giving me more details, he was clear and concise about what was happening for him and I was able to offer him my positive energy and love and shift the energy in our home quickly and efficiently. No fuss, no muss. I was only able to do this because of his clarity in sharing. How often have you found yourself in a mini-drama with another person, only to later find out it was a huge misunderstanding or that even better, you both were in actual agreement but did not understand the other’s communication? Clear and concise is understanding yourself and what you feel accurately. It is about giving information in as few words as possible, but giving all the important data that is needed for the other person to respond well and efficiently. If you tell me you are hurt and I try to help you with a tourniquet, I will prove to be quite a failure in helping you when I discover you had a burn, not a cut. Accuracy and details are key to have a clear and concise exchange. For more information about this and other effective communication keys, go to deborahrose.com and sign up for my free newsletter and get your free gift.